sicky pants.

last week one of our family friends approached me and asked if I would be willing to sing the national anthem at the republican GOP victory breakfast. of course I said yes, I mean, who the heck could turn that opportunity down? 

howevaa, I woke up on Monday morning with a sore throat and runny nose and started to think that maybe I wasn't going to be able to sing for the governor. 

I was way bummed, not gonna lie. 

I was crossing my fingers the whole week that I would feel better in time to sing on Thursday morning, but I just got worse and worse. when I went to sleep on Wednesday I could barely speak, and knew that if I woke up Thursday morning feeling like I had been feeling all week that there was no way I could do it. 

sure enough, I woke up on Thursday not being able to sing a note. 

but, I brewed some throat tea, sprayed some nasty throat spray, and hoped that everything would go over smoothly. 

when I arrived at soundcheck I was coughing and sneezing as I walked up to the mic, and I was absolutely terrified. if I couldn't sing it at sound check, I wouldn't be able to perform at this amazing event. 

first of all, I had never sung the national anthem all the way through before as a solo. and it's an intense song to sing.  second, I couldn't speak a word without going into a coughing fit. 

I stood in front of the mic, took a deep breath, and sang.

somehow I was able to get through the national anthem without any problems. 

that whole experience was such a confidence builder for me, and I still don't know how on earth I was able to sing such a crazy hard song without dying half way through or something. check out a little bit of my performance on my Instagram @thebellejewel 

Oh, Utah

This past week I've had the chance to be up at Education Week while my dad signed in the bookstore. I learned so much about the mind, marriage, who I am, and what my purpose in life is. It was a truly inspiring experience. I also met Marvin Goldstein, a hilarious and incredibly talented concert pianist.  If you haven't ever been to education week, you need to go!

Something that has been on my mind a lot lately is choices. (things are about to get deep, hold on)

What if i made the wrong choice by unenrolling myself from ALA?
Should i be starting college next semester?
Is moving to utah even the right thing to do?

These questions have kept me up for countless nights.

Choices are scary.

Being up on the BYU campus, singing at the open mics up here in Utah, and looking at homes gives me such a positive energy and i can't help but feel at home up here.


But then as soon as i log onto instagram or twitter, my timeline is filled with pictures of my friends attending the first highschool football game of the season, or  doing things that every highschooler does.

And i feel like I've made all the wrong choices.

My biggest fear is regret. What if i regret not having a "normal" senior year with all the amazing friends I've made in arizona? I won't get to walk at graduation with my friends, i'll receive a diploma from my online highschool. What if I move to Utah and im absolutely miserable? I might not make friends as great as the ones i already have.  Every question I've been asking myself lately has started with "what if". Theres another side of it though. What if i move to Utah and my music goes super well? There are so many opportunities for my music up here; people really believe in me. What if Arizona just isn't the right place for me anymore? I've had some great memories there, but everyone has got to grow up and move on sometime anyways.

anywaysss, only time can give me the answers to those questions.

Regardless of whatever happens, I'll go with the flow.

*deep breath*

Back to what i mentioned earlier about the open mic nights, i went to one this week at Velour and had the time of my life. The music scene up here is so unique, and there are so many supportive musicians and appreciators of musicians up here. I LOVE IT. Music is beyond healing for me, and to be able to perform for a group of native Utahans felt just like home.

A few weeks ago, i caught up with an old friend of mine and was able to do a photoshoot with him. Way back when in Sophmore year, Alton and I would take pictures of our outfits together. Everyone said we were weird and conceited, but we knew that we were fab (jokinggg) so we didnt care what they said. 

soo two years later we booked a professional photographer (keenan baird) to capture us doing what we do best. 

I'm in love with the results. 

Overall its been a great week, and im having a great time up here in utah. For those of you wondering, we haven't moved quite yet! Soon, soon. 

Crazy Week

This week has been a week of photoshoots, reuniting with old friends, and music. 

So yeah, I'd say it was a good week. 

On Wednesday I got the opportunity to shoot with Keenan Baird at his studio in Tempe. Shooting with me was one of my good friends from Higley Highschool that I hadn't seen in ages. I think i've said this before but i love love love the kind of friendships and relationships where you can pick up right where you left off even after not seeing eachother for a long time.

That shoot was incredible, I'll post some pictures in a few weeks and you'll see what i mean.

Thursday night was my big show at Sozo Coffeehouse, and was easily one of my favorite performances. So many people came out to support me and for that i am incredibly grateful. It's so humbling for me to see that there are people out there that care about my music just as much as i do.I cant even emphasize how much fun i had that night.  

There's something about performing that is truly addictive, and I wish every night could be like thursday night. 


And just yesterday i had a photoshoot with the darling Kammie Maschue. Check out her photography  here! She's so darling and so easy to work with. She totally captured my vintage vision and im super super happy with how the pictures turned out. 

On a side note, i just recently designed some Belle Jewel merchandise, and it's now up for sale! Go to the website here. 

Here's hoping next week is as wonderful as this last one was. 

Modeling

In my experience and from what i've seen, being a model is viewed as a negative thing. 

Soo why do I model?

I think that at some point almost every little girl has a dream of being a famous pop star or model, and I was no different. When I was thirteen or fourteen I got signed to Leighton Talent Agency, and they have been wonderful to me. 

I began modeling because, quite simply, I enjoyed it. I quickly learned that the culture surrounding professional modeling wasn't the best, most of the time. There is such a huge emphasis placed on body image, appearance, and what other people think about you. 

Guess what?

None of that matters.

people get so caught up in how much they weigh or what their friends will think of them or what they do and don't look like; it takes away from the whole experience.

What matters to me is that I have a great time getting my hair and makeup done, posing for a camera, and creating art. Each picture tells a story, and there aren't many things i love more than looking back on pictures i've taken and remembering all the crazy fun stuff that went on behind the scenes. 

Through modeling i've built my self esteem, met incredible people, and gone on so many unforgettable adventures. 

In my most recent photoshoot, i had the honor of modeling for a dear friend of mine, the lovely Sarah Waggoner. Every month, she does a themed shoot, and she asked me to help her out in capturing her vision of shadow. For this shoot, I was modeling in a thick velvet dress in a parking garage in the middle of an arizona summer day. I'd say the results were well worth it, Sarah did an incredible job of capturing the contrast between light and dark in this project.  Look at the rest of the pictures here on her website! www.sarahwaggoner.com

outfit of the day

today i was feeling extremely fancy. no particular reason, i just haven't done my hair and makeup in three days and was hoping to compensate a little by dressing up real nice today. 

believe it or not, every part of this outfit was either thrifted or found at a garage sale. 

there are two things i love a ton: feeling pretty and getting a good deal. this is why hunting through racks of ugly clothes just to find one shirt is super fun for me. (weird, i know.)

in this fancy outfit i'm wearing a black babydoll shirt with adorable knitted accents on the sleeves. just $6 at a consignment store in Tempe.
 the jeans were only 14 bucks at name brand exchange, and the bracelet i found for .99 cents at Epic thrift store in Mesa. 
The jelly sandals were a super lucky find; i had been hunting for some for quite a while and found them on sale at Hot Topic for 7 dollars. 
and last but not least: my favorite part of today's outfit. My bag. i picked that baby up from a garage sale for only 15 dollars. easily one of my best garage sale finds. 

my hair is just a simple high pony twisted and tied off at the end. 

PS (not every post will be about my clothes, just hang in there, lovies) 

Rants and Rambles II

Goodbyes are never easy. 

Something i've been observing lately is that  a huge part of growing up (for me)  is being able to say goodbye, and in these last few months i think i've said more good byes and see you laters than i ever have before. 

Growing up means that you start to go your own way by doing new things, meeting new people, and going new places. Because of this, people split up and slowly fade out eachothers lives. It sucks. But just because goodbyes are hard to do, doesn't mean they're always a bad thing. 

 Saying goodbye to a toxic relationship with someone was one of the hardest but most positive things i've ever done. 

Saying goodbye to all my arizonians when i move up to UT will be awful. But  moving will give me the chance to meet some more amazing people.

alright, enough with the rants and rambles for now. 

my very bestest friend since seventh grade just visited AZ from california this last week, and i got to spend some time with her before she went back to the coast. LOVE that girl. 

her and i are lucky enough to have the kind of friendship where we can go without seeing eachother for a year and still be just as close as we were in junior high.

i'm not sure what i'd do without that woman, she's the bomb diggity and beyond.

While she was here, we thrifted for HOURS. im super excited about my haul, which ill talk about more in my next post. 

we also stayed up watching "Keeping up with the Kardashians" until 3 in the morning.

we're a little obsessed. 

anyways, this last week was wonderful. there arent many things i love more than reconnecting with people i havent seen in forever. 

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